Adelle - Our Angel Baby

Yesterday I held a friend's baby.  This might not seem like a big deal as I have held many babies, many times before.  But yesterday was different... it was the first time I held a baby since loosing my own. 

I have explained before that I keep seeing babies everywhere, but it's different when you see them from a distance.  When Alexy's mom asked me if I wanted to hold her, I had been holding my breath and telling myself I was doing really well just being in the same room as the little one.  I did not cry!  Alexy kept looking at me, as if to say "it's ok".  Funny how children have this uncanny way of seeing into your soul. 

So, I picked her up.  In that moment I thought to myself...  all these babies are not going to go anywhere.  I never wanted them to either.  They are all unique, and after all a person is a person no matter how small.  (Isn't that another Dr. Seuss quote?)

It wasn't a perfect moment.  I still felt a jolt of sadness when hubby held her because I wasn't able to give him his little girl.  But last night when hubby asked me how it was to hold Alexy, I wasn't not lying when I said "it was ok".