Tuesday, January 12, 2010
One Step Forward Two Steps Back
10:35 AM | Posted by
Mireille |
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I braved the cold winter winds this morning to be one with nature. The pros say that 15 minutes in the sun can help with emotional well-being. It's another one of those ying and yang things for me. The benefits of the sun were outweighted by a feeling of sadness. A few months ago when I walked the same path, I wasn't alone. I had this little being inside of me and I was amazed with life's miracle. I had a whole future ahead of me complete with Adelle & hubby. Nothing else in the world mattered. I was happy.
Like a naive child, deep down I hoped that if I showed God how much I loved Adelle by how much pain her passing caused me, I would be rewarded with her return. Of course I know this is insane! I am reminded of the finality every day. Our lives meshed together for a short while but we had to go our seperate ways. For what reason I'm not sure... I'm still searching and I may search for a very long time.
I'm not sure where I am going with this. I feel lost (where is my life taking me?) and just needed to write things down. No comments required today... I know you're reading and wish you could help but there is nothing to say. This is my path to follow and healing takes time - one step forward and two steps back. Luckily, tomorrow is another day.
Like a naive child, deep down I hoped that if I showed God how much I loved Adelle by how much pain her passing caused me, I would be rewarded with her return. Of course I know this is insane! I am reminded of the finality every day. Our lives meshed together for a short while but we had to go our seperate ways. For what reason I'm not sure... I'm still searching and I may search for a very long time.
I'm not sure where I am going with this. I feel lost (where is my life taking me?) and just needed to write things down. No comments required today... I know you're reading and wish you could help but there is nothing to say. This is my path to follow and healing takes time - one step forward and two steps back. Luckily, tomorrow is another day.
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About Me
- Mireille
- On November 6th, 2009, I gave birth to our angel Adelle at 34 weeks. She had already grown her wings... I am going through a difficult time and am learning a lot about myself and what it means to be the mommy of an Angel. I hope that by sharing my experiences, other angels' moms will find some comfort in knowing they are not alone. I am married to the most wonderful man on Earth. I am blessed with the most precious family and friends. My heart will always be full of love for my Angel Baby Adelle.
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1 comments:
Here is the link to my best friends "Angel Baby" website. She is now with her angel baby too and I am keeping the website up and running for them both. Loss is never easy. Like we told Courtnei when she died "Missing you will be hard but remembering you will make it easier" Good luck. Lots of love.
Ali
http://courtneitayleurlotridge.com/
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